The Real Deal

Growing up I imagined that marriage was a beautiful beginning to a fairy tale life that included being with the love of my life in a model home with a some perfectly sweet children. As I grew up though, I realized how wrong that really was. Although in some ways that dream can be some what accomplished, it is through great sacrifice, self control, and work. Complete work and effort. My beginning thoughts of marriage did not include the harsh truths of life. Life is hard, but I had often found that those things I find hard bring the most pleasure to me once finished. those things I put so much effort into end up being what I treasure most and what I gained a copious amount of knowledge from. In marriage I feel sometimes people feel that they can just live their same lives, but with another person. There was a time In my family that some of us started to move out of the house or get married. As this happened, I realized that my family wasn't as close as they were in previous years. this bothered me. As I thought about it more, I realized what we had been doing wrong. My family had been putting the same effort of communication then as we did in the past. Because of the distance, for our family to stay closer, we needed to try even harder to stay in contact. After we realized this we told each other that we would try to call and text each other more often. It is hard to have major addition or even loss in your life and not have to change your way of living at least a little. I learned that in my future marriage, I will have to change some ways I live to make the marriage be successful. I am sure that as I do that, it will become very precious to me. Knowing that helps me to prepare and to look forward to such beautiful time.

Love

What is love? Love is defined by so many different people in so many different ways. How can we know what love really means to a person? Their definition of love can be completely different to what your view on love is. Of all of these definitions of love though, how can we know when it is true, undeniable, and unmistakable love? In the book we are reading for class, Marriage and Family 8th Edition it talks about the different ways people think and act when they say they are in love. One way they explained being in love is when you would do anything for that person, you want to get to know them more, you want to spend all of your time with them and you feel comfortable around them. I have never been in love, but as I read this I was reminded about my own parents and siblings and their spouses. Each of these loving couples especially show examples of selflessness towards each other. They want to others comfort just as much or more than their own comfort. When I think of my own future family and relationship with my husband, I have a goal to be just as selfless as my family. That is how I define love.

Mothers

In chapter 9 verse 5 of the Book of Mormon it beautifully states a lesson of worth when it says, "Wherefore, do not spen money for that shich is of no worth, nor your laborfor that which cannot satisfy..." My own translation of these words is to not waist time and energy towardds something that is not of any value to your body or spirit. Some people think of that as being a mother. Mothers strive each day to help their children's lives be better often with no return. But, as a successful mother who loves her kids, she knows there is much in return. As a mother that puts all of her effort into loving her child or children, it gets hard, tiring, and very frustrating. in a video we watched for our class, a feminist women stated that women in the past were supposed to take care of the children and love it. When was taking care of children ever an easy task? I would  want to change what she said ans say that although having children is hard, there is love put into it because of the reward od seeing the child progress and the attachment from birth. Although she was talking about the role of a women, it still bothered me about the view he took on motherhood. Theodore Roosevelt once said, "Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty...I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life." Motherhood is worth it and brings so many useful life lessons and incomparable love.

The Possible

For our class we had to watch a few videos regarding social and economical class. I watched how people in different classes acted differently and had certain unspoken social rules that they followed. A man explained in one of the videos that it is pretty much impossible to change from one class to another. Why he said it was hard was because of the unspoken rules. They had to change the person they were and their personal habits. I do not entirely agree with him. Although, it may be hard, it is more possible than he said it was. It is only hard, in my opinion, if the person truly does not want to change who they are, but just want the lifestyle. There is a movie that I watched, that gives a good example of this called, "The Unsinkable Molly Brown". In this movie Molly was was raised in a little cabin that had a father and some rowdy boys. Molly dreamed of a different life though. She dreamed of the fancy life with bright colors and expensive furniture. Because of her dream she learned to read, write, and act like a lady. Although this example is not a true story, her ambition to have a better life lead her to completely changed how she acted and even looked. Ambition and faith in one's self, is ultimately what can make the change very possible and successful.

Different, But Good

As a younger person, I had collected some friends that I would do all my activities with. We all created our own dynamic within our own wonderful friendships. We had inside jokes together, liked the same things, and enjoyed each other's company. The thing I found the most strange though, as I got to know them more, was the dynamic of their families. I always viewed it, as a child, that they were MY friends and I had My family. It was strange entering their home and seeing what their lives were actually like. It brought me to understand more of who they were. I would observe how they interacted with their mom, dad, brothers, and sisters. Sometimes it would even bring connections in my brain as to why they did the things they did. Each family has a different family dynamic and each one functions a little different. As I observed these families, I have seen many things I want to implement into my future family and some things I would want to watch out for as well. I have learned much from these different dynamics. I have also learned that just because it is not what my family does, does not make is wrong. There are many good things about different families that are good and bad as well. I love learning about other family dynamics and hope to use the best of them all in my own future family.